Thoughts For Your Hole- More Female Late Night Talk Show Hosts! by Smith Q. Johns

David Letterman

Art by Brenda Farnam

Or even how about just one?

I’m not really hip to news usually but I did overhear that Stephen Colbert was on his way to being one of the new Kings of Late Night. And good for him, he’s one of my favorite people. Seriously, there probably isn’t a better MAN for the job. (More specifically, “white man.”)

Even just locally I’ve seen brilliant and funny women doing standup, not to mention the numerous other female comedians around the world and I’m not even in the scene.

I grew up on Carson (thanks to my grandfather) and Letterman (thanks to my dad) and I highly enjoyed them both. I’ve only seen a little of Conan (he was always on past my bedtime) but I loved him too.

I’ve hardly ever had cable, especially in the last decade, but now thanks to the Internet I have the option to watch Jimmy Kimmel or Jimmy Fallon and have seen some surprisingly good stuff as well.

I hated the fuck out of Leno. Passionately… Just loathed the guy. But I’ve seen a lot of Leno because of the guests he’s had on there.

Jay Leno

Art by Drew Anderson

There are many other TV hosts I’ve appreciated over time – all of these guys basically being middle-aged white guys, at least in their prime they were.

I did also watch some Arsenio in my early teens, and I liked him too. It’s not that these guys (not Leno) didn’t do a great job or anything. There’s no doubt in mind that they were (are) extremely talented.

And I’m not sure what is on television currently, and I’m sure there are plenty of shows with women and minorities hosts, but I think the key difference is that shows like the ones mentioned above get the prime spots, AND the most funding.

So why isn’t there a woman or a minority taking Leno’s or Letterman’s place? When Colbert leaves probably years from now, will we be much different? Probably not. And if so the change will probably only be minuscule.

Sadly I’m not even saying this in an equal rights kind of way (which is obviously the much better way), I’m just saying it in a “Jesussssss, how about change it up a little?” way.

Conan O'Brien

Art by Brenda Farnam

I think for me the most annoying thing about all of this is that if I were to suggest this in conversation most people would probably respond with something like, “What?! Who would they choose? Rosie O’Donnel?” As if there are only a handful of choices of woman hosts in the entire world. That out of the few billion women in the world only three might be suitable to be the new Johnny Carson- if only they were funnier.

Sure it’s about supply and demand but what are we still demanding? We want nothing different than the same ole thing we’ve had for such a long time, and for no good reason. We only want what we are used to.

I look forward to seeing many great Stephen Colbert videos but I wish for two things in the future.

1. Either Stephen Colbert leaves his show early and lets not

-another-white-dude replace him.

Art by Drew Anderson

Art by Drew Anderson


2. He gets a sex change.

I guess there is one more…

3. I get to work for Stephen Colbert because he is my idol. Not even writing or anything just a higher paying job than the one I have now. Not even higher paying I guess just a different job/change pace would be nice…


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