This morning I was going to my bus and an earlier one happened to come along. I wasn’t quite at my stop but I flagged it down and for some reason it actually picked me up.
I got on and felt stares from the other passengers.
Normally buses don’t stop like that for people. Maybe the bus driver has a thing for nerds. I felt like a privileged supermodel and knew that if I were in their shoes I would be burning holes in my face, too.
Immediately after I settled into my seat and couldn’t feel their stares anymore, a large truck flew by and knocked the side mirror off the bus. It was a loud plastic-and-glass-breaking sound.
We had to stop and all get off and wait and catch the next bus. The next bus was the bus I usually catch, so I was probably the only person not going to be late to my destination.
The person driving the truck that had destroyed the mirror was visibly upset, probably fearing losing their job.
Passengers on the bus were also upset, since now they would be late arriving to their destination. I presume many of these people were going to work and because of this maybe some were scared because they had no chances left to be late. Maybe they were scared of getting fired, too.
Although it wasn’t my fault a part of me still felt like it was. “What if numerous people’s lives changed as a result of me?” I thought, despite my innocence. I just couldn’t help but think that I had somehow messed with the space-time continuum.
But for now, we were on the second bus and were back on track, with the mirror still intact.
As we headed on our way another potential future-passenger flagged the bus down. She was literally running late and I immediately thought, “Bus driver, we are already not on time to deliver all of these folks, so don’t pick up this person.”
How unselfish I was to think of everyone else and yet once again, the bus driver stopped to let her on. Twice in one day is rare in my experience.
We all looked at the skinny privileged college student with disdain. She paid her fare and sat down and I disapproved of her so hard, harder than I had of anyone in a while.
And suddenly I felt normal again. Finally I got to be the one doing the staring again.
I was then back to where I belong, jealously judging people.