Thoughts For Your Hole by Smith Q. Johns

It Really Sucks When People Pay For Their Food

Breakfast by Maxine Danger

Art by Maxine Danger, 4 Year-Old

Early one morning, security at a place I worked asked me how long before we remove the breakfast food, and replace it with the lunch menu. She asked me this while on the clock.

I then noticed her circling the perimeter of the breakfast bar for the next four hours until it was lunchtime.

She basically did not leave the area that entire time. Every time I looked up they were within about fifty feet (and they wear street clothes and aren’t in uniform) and she was just lurking around the whole time.

The humorous thing was that there were a few times that there wasn’t a single customer around. I mean this person must have been craving some yummy biscuits and eggs as she seemed to be guarding it like a dog (as they say).

Security is supposed to watch people, not objects. They aren’t like the folks that wait alone at museums and guard diamonds like we see in the movies. I doubted that she caught anyone all day.

At the end of her shift I happened to be nearby as she was talking to her co-worker that had come in to relieve her. She stated how unfortunately everyone she trailed ended up paying for their food and how it “sucked.”

Although I have a feeling that she didn’t catch anyone that day because her focus was on the food, I assume she was genuinely annoyed that the few customers she did follow weren’t actually there to steal. What a bummer that no one stole and that no one gave her the chance to exert a little power.

But on the other hand the desire for bacon makes us do crazy things. It all just goes to prove the old saying: “Sausage is the most important meal of the day.”

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